Tuesday, July 31, 2012

A Little Catching Up To Do

Our time with Elle started out a little bumpy, as we had some health scares that landed her in the NICU at 10 days old, followed by a return hospital visit the next weekend. All is well now, praise God. But let me tell you, we went through the scariest, darkest moments I have ever been through in my life. There is so much to share, and I hope to write about it in depth some day. For now, I'd like to share 3 big take-aways:

First - I learned that, as much as I try to control my life, I am, ultimately, not in control. In our scariest times, the times we are most unsure about things...we must call on God, who is our immovable Rock and Fortress. HE is the one who is in control -sovereign over everything. And He is love, and He can be trusted. He is unchanging. He never ever changes! 2 Samuel 22:3: "My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation. He is my stronghold, my refuge and my savior..."

Second - I connect in a new, deeper way to my mom and my precious sister Valerie, who died 3 days after birth. I had heard stories of my older sister all my life, and what those days and moments were like in the hospital. I thought it was playing out before my eyes, with Elle. I now grieve as I think about sweet Valerie, and for the utter heartbreak and loss my parents went through. I will talk about and remember my sister more often now.

Third - I have a tender place in my heart for parents who have babies in the NICU. There are no words to describe what it is like saying goodnight to your little one and having to leave them. Especially when their health is up in the air. It is a scary time. May Jesus' peace that passes all understanding play a special role in those hospital rooms.